September 4, 2012
Dearest Allison -
This is a big week. You start Kindergarten and you turn 5.
You are thrilled about both. And contrary to the tears that keep falling, I am thrilled as well.
School is wonderful, and I am excited for you to explore a new world, surrounded by your peers and friends. Asking good questions, learning, reading, exploring.
As you enter school, my mother gut goes into full effect overdrive. I pray that I have prepared you enough for the journey ahead and that I have the strength, good health and wisdom to continue to guide and prepare you.
Trust your gut. It never leads you astray.
Help others when they need it.
Do your best.
Try (almost) everything once.
As a mother, I would love to keep you forever in a safe, cozy cocoon, blocking out all pain, sadness and suffering. But I realize that all of that is part of living. You will have your feelings hurt. You will get upset and angry. You will fail. But I am confident that you will overcome all obstacles.
If all else fails, pick yourself up, dust yourself off, take a deep breath and just carry on. As I always tell you, as my first grade teacher told me, Life is Not Fair. But it is messy, gloriously fun, wonderful, and worth the ride.
You have wanted to be 5 for a long time. Probably because I kept telling you that you couldn't do something "until you turned five" or you could only begin doing something "when you turned five". I, for some reason, thought that was a long time from now. Except that now it is happening in four days. Four short days.
I keep telling you that my tears are not of sadness, they are tears of joy and awe and amazement. You are, quite literally, growing up right before my eyes. And the adventure of life is just beginning for you.
Please remember that no one else determines your self worth. YOU are a unique, glorious, amazing being.
You are a magical kid. And I keep pinching myself that I was chosen to be your mother.
I am not perfect. Far from it. But I promise you that I will always try my best when it comes to you and that my intentions are always good.
And never forget how very much I love you. I am always your biggest cheerleader and never far behind.